Eventually the time will come to recognize a loved one’s death. Do you know what kind of memorial they would like? Asking now, you might get a wave off: “I’ll be gone, so do whatever you want!” Or you might get some very specific feedback. These days, there are many possibilities. Funerals, with burials, generally happen within a week of death. They are traditionally formal and focus on loss. By contrast, a celebration of life can occur at a time and place, and in a style, that reflects your loved one.
When designing a celebration of life, the options are wide open. Consider the celebration an opportunity for people to share stories, tears, laughter, and gratitude in tribute to your relative. The event might be big, small, formal, or informal—whatever matches your priorities. Here are some examples to discuss with your family member or for you to think about, if discussion isn’t possible:
- Host a small group for lunch in a private room at a favorite restaurant or have a catered lunch or tea at someone’s home. An intimate circle provides time for each person to share some memories.
- Gather at your relative’s beloved nature spot, be it beach or mountainside, for a day. Start with a ceremony of honor and reminiscence, and then enjoy the outdoors and a potluck together.
- Rent a hall or other community space, hire musicians (bagpipe? harp?) and a caterer. Choose a master of ceremonies, and ask several people who were close with your relative to give tributes, perhaps each covering a different period of your loved one’s life. Provide an open mic for others to add their stories.
- Make it a virtual celebration so friends and family from anywhere in the world can participate. Everyone can share stories and display photos and contribute to a digital memory board.
Personalize it. No matter what the venue or size of gathering, consider creating a slideshow or memory table with photos or keepsakes. Add music, reading, or videos that reflect your loved one’s interests and spirit. You might include an interactive element, such as asking guests to bring a photo or favorite quote for a memory book, or offering them something symbolic to take home.
Get support. Ask a cherished spiritual leader, friend, or celebrant to help lead the event. Lean on friends and family for help setting up, managing tech, or handling music. Having support will help you remain present as you celebrate and honor your family member’s life.
Looking for support with an aging loved one?
As the Roanoke and Lynchburg experts in family caregiving, we at Gentle Shepherd Hospice offer help for every stage of the aging journey. Give us a call at 1-800-789-0586 (toll-free) to learn more.
Recent Comments